The fire that Pepto just can’t quench

The last three things I googled should tell you a little bit about where I am in my life at this moment.

1) Au Pairing in France

2) Teaching English in China

3) Communications graduate programs in Australia

As you can see, I am quite literally all over the map. It’s not that I don’t know where I want to be, it’s more that time is the enemy. Youth is fleeting, and so are the opportunities and freedoms that it affords. Sure, most things don’t have an age limit beyond the standard, “you’re 18, you should vote and go to war but don’t drink yet!” Thing is, a lot of things do have an age limit. It’s not spelt out, but it’s ingrained in our culture and views of how life should be.

As much as I like to dream otherwise, I’m anticipating a 9-5 life at some point. That means max 2-3 weeks of vacation a year. How am I supposed to learn a language while immersed in another country in a couple of weeks?! Or skip down to Antarctica after sampling the wines of Chile and taking in the Igauzu Falls in Argentina?!

That’s the thing. I’m not. I’m not supposed to live my life from stepping stone to stepping stone if it doesn’t lead to a stagnant end, our culture doesn’t allow it. A resume gap means you’re unreliable.

Sure, I could say SCREW IT I’M LEAVING IT ALL BEHIND AND BECOMING A MONK IN BHUTAN, but in reality, I won’t.

As much as I like to think my spirit is free and my hands are untied, that’s not quite true. Sure, I don’t have children or a husband to tie me down just yet (hallelujah), but I do have dreams for my future and things in my life right now that prevent me from completely letting go and starting anew over and over again. Thank goodness for that, because having nothing to lose is no way to live.

So for now I’m looking to float around for short periods, to discover the world and myself from dream to dream and returning to what I know and love to regroup in between spurts of avoiding reality (read: live with my parents). I might have a bit of a “resume gap” for a while, but I know that I will have learned more than I ever could in graduate school by exploring the world and chasing the fire in my tummy (the kind not quenched by Pepto).

So for now I’m free to wander and explore and au pair and teach, but most of all, I’m ready to learn.

Okay, Google. Let’s do this.

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